To "get" where I'm coming from read this and then watch this video link......
I want to talk about grief today.
I want to talk about healing.
And I want to talk about the freedom side of it........
You cannot rush your healing.
Everyone's healing and grief journey looks different. One's path is not better or worse than the other as the pain and hurt is still that.....pain and hurt.
There is a side of grief that some do not talk about because I truly believe many have not yet experienced it......
It is the deep PEACE, the constant JOY, and the ongoing HOPE that comes when you reach "the other side".......
To be transparent with you, I honestly have felt guilty off and on for feeling this way! (Like, how is it I loving life and I'm happy and OKAY when someone very important to me is missing from my life?!)
Let me tell you something........
The enemy wants us to stay "stuck" in a place of isolation from talking about how we are doing to others......the enemy wants us to feel guilt from the "would have, should have" mentality once someone is gone....the enemy wants us to feel anxious that we could lose someone else.....the enemy wants us to feel depressed, down, and not have hope.
THOSE ARE ALL LIES AND NOT FROM GOD!!!!!!!!!
Transforming our mindset and facing TRUE healing TAKES INNER WORK. (We must MAKE TIME to slow down and FACE IT.....to FEEL how we are feeling and truly work through it!)
It takes CONFRONTING the deep hurt, the debilitating pain, and the crippling fear that comes along with losing a loved one......
It is a dark, intimidating, and difficult chapter to walk through BUT God promises us we NEVER have to face ANYTHING alone!
It took me two years to get to a place where I was ready to move forward and walk through that tough healing.......I feel like I was a mess on the inside until I got to that point......ignoring the pain, numbing how we feel, and stuffing emotions deeper within are not healthy.
A theme I've talked about (on 12/31/2020 with my live video) is chasing the lion in 2021. Grief and pain from grieving is FOR SURE a lion.
To come out on the other side and TRULY feel the hope, the joy, and the peace WE MUST FACE IT - wrestle with it - experience and truly feel our feelings...........
AND THEN RELEASE IT TO GOD AND BE FREE!!!!!!!!!!!
It is such a light feeling to not carry the burdens of the unhealthy emotions we guilt ourselves like we are "supposed" to feel.
Anything sad, dark, and out of a place of despair is NOT OF GOD.
As real and dark as the thoughts and emotions grief brings, we must remember something.......
Darkness is ONLY allowed to exist because of the ABSENCE OF LIGHT.
GOOD is ALWAYS GREATER than evil!
POSITIVE is ALWAYS STRONGER than negative!
GOD is ALWAYS MORE POWERFUL than the enemy!
When we SHINE LIGHT on the dark areas needing to be healed deep within us, THE LIGHT COMES IN!
The broken, cracked, dysfunctional parts of our inner beings can be FULLY RESTORED when we confront it and do the inner work and allow GOD to fill those hurt spots!
Today my brother would have turned 28.
I miss the opportunity to celebrate with him and enjoy another year with him here. That is real.
What else is real is the fact that death has lost its sting! There is SO MUCH MORE TO OUR LIFE than what we simply experience here on earth! (I am thinking of 1 Corinthians 15:55 here....)
C.S. Lewis says it perfectly: “You do not have a soul. You are a soul. You have a body.”
Be encouraged that your loved one is not "gone" but rather just not here physically! There is MUCH MORE LIVING to experience!
Focus on the good memories and the wonderful experiences you had in common!
For me, I smile thinking about the music created together, paddle boarding, the deep conversations, the silly moments, the smiles and laughs.......
I hold onto those things!
Do NOT fear working THROUGH your healing!
I'll never forget....on the day of Zach's celebration of life, when it was over my grandpa hugged me goodbye and told me there are different kinds of tears.......and crying is healthy and good and it is okay to have a good cry.......that stuck with me!
(If you know my personality of course I looked into that and it is true! Our body actually produces different "types" of tears and they ARE HEALING! (link about healing tears )
My reason for sharing that is because crying is PART of working through the difficult chapters and seasons of healing!
If you get anything out of this post today - PLEASE TAKE TIME TO DO THE INNER WORK!
Turn the dark parts deep inside you into light!
We are each created to do INCREDIBLE things in our lifetimes! We must heal from what is broken within!
We must move past what we are hung up on!
FACE the pain, CONFRONT the confusion, WORK THROUGH the stress and get to the root of it so you can HEAL and BE FREE!!!!! It is difficult, but I can promise you it is ALL WORTH IT!
I still have moments of sadness, experiences that I truly wish Zach was with me for, and things I want to call and tell him......but overall I am at peace and have hope and joy knowing this is not the end and I WILL see him again!
Your loved ones would not want to see you hurting and we must make it our goal to LIVE INTENTIONALLY and BE OUR BEST SELVES (which includes healing!)
I want to encourage you to "Chase the Lion" when it comes to healing and working through your grief.
God wants you to be set free!
God wants you to be happy!
You are meant to live your absolute BEST LIFE and it starts with doing THE INNER WORK!
Be embraced!
-Andrea
Lyrics from this song which I want to share:
"When your fear is currency
And you feel that urgency
You want peace but there's war in your head
Maybe that's where life is born
When our façades are torn
Pain gives birth to the promise ahead"
Listen to this song: I Won't Let You Go
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