SOCIAL MEDIA

Tuesday, October 9, 2018

Grieving The Loss Of A Sibling...


 “As long as I am working on my grief, the grief work is working”.

It may take months or even years to get to the place where we feel back to "ourselves"........

I am finding this is how grieving works.....and I am allowing God to fill the gaps, fill the voids, as He hears my thoughts while knowing my every emotion along this journey of two years today......

Losing a sibling is not the most common of topics or discussions....
If you have lost a sibling I can relate to how you are feeling......When a parent dies, you lose the past. When a child dies, you lose the future. When a sibling dies, you lose the past and the future.... That is the grief of a sibling—grief for what was past, and grief for what should have been the future. It is a different type of grief that not everyone experiences....

ALL types of grief are difficult. ALL chapters of readjusting and re-learning how to live from that moment of loss, forward are for sure a journey and a process of finding that new version of ourselves...it demands a different version of us we NEVER thought we'd need to discover....

There are so many emotions and phases tied with losing a sibling and I'll share some of mine since there is no such thing as "normal" :

-Shock
-Pain
-Anger
-Regret
-Guilt
-Working Through Processing
-Acceptance 
-Reconstruction
-Hope
-Living Intentionally
-Focusing Only On Good Memories 
-Joy (YES. This is possible. I used to have guilt about feeling this way as I heal, but that is a LIE from the enemy. There is NOTHING wrong with having JOY again after a tragedy...God still wants us to live JOY-FILLED lives as our time on earth is only temporary! Our loss does not define us, but rather becomes part of our story and character)

I've heard it said that healing takes time.
That is 100% true.
I've heard it said that it gets easier with time.
That is also true......Time does not make the pain go away, however the sting of those raw emotions lessen....

I honestly do not know how people deal with the loss of a loved one without God. The comfort, the love, the peace, the support, and now the joy I am walking through is ONLY from God. There is NOTHING that could even come close to how God has helped me and is still currently helping me, and will continue to help me with my healing from this difficult experience in my life.

I want to encourage you to press into God.....
I want to remind you to allow healing to take time. Take the time you need.....
I want to let you know I'm here to talk if you need a listening ear, someone to cry with, someone to remind you that it is OKAY to feel these things.....

God created us for relationships and to feel deep emotions....both good and bad ones. 
God also created us with a longing for a savior...to have a relationship with Him, who is sooooooo much larger than this world and anything we will face. And we WILL have trials, tough chapters, and moments of confusion......

You can't rush your healing.

It is a journey.

Just as a flower loses its petals and blooms again the next spring, so will we shed tears, mourn the loss of our loved one, but we will ALSO be renewed, we will grow and bloom again to our fullest potential through this season as that is how God wants us to live!

I'm currently reading the book, "In a pit with a lion on a snowy day." 
It is helping me with my mindset in this season and journey of healing and growth. It is helping me process how I face anxieties and fears that I never experienced until losing my brother. If you're looking for a good read that isn't necessarily for grief, but rather for living a victorious and courageous life, check it out!

I want you to heal.
I want you to grow.
I know you will come out stronger on the other end.

Keep going.
One day at a time.
God's got this.
God's got you. 


1 comment :

  1. I have lost three younger siblings, a stillborn granddaughter, my parents and my husband Mike's parents, within two weeks of each other, fathers in 2007 and mothers in 2009. I know loss. My husband has MS as does two of our three sons. I grieve for their health, the things they have lost but I praise God they are still here, still functioning and able to what they can. Just a few thoughts on living through pain and loss. It affects me, it sometimes consumes me, but God sustains me and we go on. I have learned to appreciate the smallest of insights, smells, tastes, touch and sights. I have gained strength through a tiny mustard seed which God planted in me. This life is not about me but those who need me, depend upon me and whom I love. I love many, and many love me. God Bless.

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